How to choose a toy in five minutes

Question 1: how old will they be when they open it?

Not how old they are now — how old on the day. This matters most under three, where a three-month gap changes what is safe, and it is the reason a present bought in September for a January birthday sometimes misses.

Then take the manufacturer’s age grade literally. Under three it is a small-parts test result rather than a suggestion; above three it is a difficulty judgment worth respecting, because a toy graded too high gets built by an adult while the child watches.

Question 2: what do they already have?

The single highest-hit-rate move in toy buying is adding to something that is already working. An expansion to a construction system they use daily beats a new system competing for the same rug, and it is nearly impossible to get wrong.

If you cannot see the toy box, ask the parents. It is not a failure of imagination — they will be relieved, and it converts a guess into a certainty.

Question 3: open or closed?

Default to open-ended unless there is a specific reason not to. A toy where the child decides the outcome cannot be finished, which is why it lasts. Ask the ten-times question: on the tenth use, is the child doing the same thing as on the first? See what open-ended means.

Question 4: what does the household have to live with?

This is the question gift buyers skip and parents never forget. Three properties decide whether a present is welcome:

• Noise. A loud toy in a flat gets put in a cupboard. See quiet toys.
• Mess. Match it to the floor. Glitter in a rented flat is a decision about someone else’s deposit.
• Space. Anything large should be checked against where it will live, not just whether it fits through the door.

A present chosen well on this axis is remembered fondly by two people rather than one.

Question 5: does anything need buying alongside it?

Batteries of the right type, in double quantity. A helmet with anything on wheels. A tray with anything sensory. Refill paper with a print camera. Adding the accessory to the same order is the difference between a present that works on the day and one that does not.

The three defaults

When you know almost nothing about the child, these rarely miss:

1. A card or board game for their age. Cheap, social, impossible to duplicate meaningfully, and played for years.
2. Art materials. Consumable, so duplication is impossible by definition.
3. A magnetic tile or brick expansion. Almost every household with a child over three has one of the two systems, and more is always useful.

Above about ten, add a fourth: cash or a gift card. At that age taste is specific and a well-meant guess frequently misses in a way the child notices.

What not to start with

Browsing. Opening a shopping site before answering the questions above is how people end up buying the thing with the best photograph, and the best photograph belongs to whichever toy demonstrates most impressively — which is almost always a closed one.